New Girl 5x15/16 'Jeff Day/Helmet': Sam- I mean SEXISM- is just so Frustrating

New Girl 5x15 and 16 have varying degrees of involvement from Sam but 'Jeff Day' stands out with a very strong statement.

Reviewed while being SPEECHLESS BY JAKE ARRIETA!!

Let me state upfront that this is a review for two episodes of New Girl, which both aired Tuesday, but I’m reviewing them as separate episodes since they had two different stories, while comparing them.

With that said, ‘Jeff Day’ miles better than ‘Helmet.’

And the reason is Sam.

Sam is such a problematic character and it took ‘Helmet’ to help me come to a satisfactory theory as to why. Plot A of the episode focuses on Jess having a sex dream about Nick and also on a Chicago Bears helmet (YES!) that Nick had given to Jess as a ‘I forgot’ Christmas gift. And Jess kept it. To prove to Sam she has no feelings for Nick (transparent bullshit), she tries to toss the helmet… to Outside Dave. Who shows it to Nick as a gift from ‘that shoulder-less Dutch boy you live with.’ Needless to say, Outside Dave owned yet another moment.

But then Nick confronts Jess about tossing the helmet, and Jess does her best to dispel the situation, and her obvious attraction to Nick, because she doesn’t want to hurt Sam, or lose his trust again. But I don’t care. I found myself utterly incapable of giving a rat named Jeremiah’s ass if Sam’s heart was broken again, except that it would cast a poor unsympathetic light on Jess and Nick for hurting him again. And I’m convinced this is all because Sam’s character has no heart. At least, not this second time around. Everything about his return has just seemed needlessly contrived, bar that solid moment where he said Jess was dangerous for him. The writers have shown even more hints this week that this will all end up with Nick and Jess rekindling anyway, and Sam is just a delay, but that puts so much pressure to make his relationship with Jess natural. And it simply doesn’t. Partially because the actors don’t have chemistry. Despite David Walton’s best efforts, his involvement in a scene makes said awkward or almost incomprehensible. The moment that’s meant to feel like a gut punch is when Jess gets the helmet stuck on her head and Sam walks in on her and Nick trying to pry it off in suggestive positions. But I felt nothing, because I couldn’t really follow what was going on. Why did Sam so easily accept Jess’ explanation if he was having trouble coping with her friendship with Nick? And if he did accept her explanation, why then did he run out disheartened when she explained they couldn’t just smash the helmet open?

The thing is, without Sam, the significance of the helmet plot is actually quite touching. Nick’s father had given him that helmet, and never told Jess. He obviously used it as an expression of love he struggles to articulate. And when Jess refuses to break it, at the risk of losing Sam (because apparently she cares), a great sense of loyalty grounds the moment with the heart that Sam lacks. It leaves one feeling regretful for what would otherwise be a sentimental plot spoiled by a strange foreign presence. Because Same is foreign in relation to the interrelationships of the Loft, in a way similar to Megan Fox’s Reagan. But Reagan had a more defined character that redeemed Fox’s guest star appearance. And with the problem resolving itself essentially by Nick making a sacrifice out of deep care for Jess, in a very self-deprecating way, ultimately the whole thing feels like Same really wasn’t needed at all. This was a Nick and Jess episode. Same is just a poorly used device.

This would also spoil the Nick/Sam feud in ‘Jeff Day’ as well, but the writers deftly deflect this plot to be focused on Jess fighting absurd but depressingly believable misogyny. Jess wants to buy a car, except her salesman is either from the 50s or a larger more boring incarnation of Negan (Flash Trivia: Negan was a car salesman before the Zombie apocalypse). So Jess creates a fake male profile of her ‘husband,’ named Jeff. Cue said Nick/Sam feud over who gets to play Jeff, the role going to Nick on a technicality. Nick and Jess being a faux couple may seem like overkill in foreshadowing their eventual making up, but Nick’s banter with eh sexist salesman made for some great jokes, and a great platform for Elizabeth Meriwether to lay down a pretty overtly feminist episode. And the touch is just perfect, and NOT impeded by an awkward Sam presence. Not til near the end at least, when all he can do is fight again. Come to think of it, Walton and Jake Johnson have a LOT more chemistry than Walton does with Deschanel, leading to a strangely good and humorous exploration of masculinity and Jess’ plight to decide her own fate for a car. Essentially, ‘Jeff day’ had a clear purpose with such strong writing that any issues with Sam are rendered less relevant.

As for the others, Kal Penn’s role as Aly’s REAL boyfriend (Dammit! I was so convinced she was lying!) was more frustrating than not (adding to a list of recent annoying guest character s in Sam and that trendy bar owner), but his rivalry with Winston via that cats led to some hilarious moments, and solidified Schmidt as a universal loyal friend as he tries to push Winston (AND Furguson) to stand up against bullies. Schmidt suffers for it in a wonderful moment at the end of ‘Helmet,’ and even Penn gets a chance to seem at least moderately redeemable. In ‘Jeff Day,’ Sonequa Martin goes from legitimately going through crazy shit on The Walking Dead to just being batshit crazy as a chronic prankstar. Her character, Ronda, tests Schmidt and Cece’s tolerance leading to Winston doing something stupid, because Winston doesn’t know when a prank goes too far. So the gang is competent in both episodes, just overshadowed by Nick, Jess, and… that guy who ‘makes money from his mind.’ Or whatever Sam is. I’m not sure.

Grade: B+ (Jeff Day)/B- (Helmet)

When I got sidetracked

-The depths of man feuds are thus: 'I’ll teach my sons to hate his sons, and I expect the same from him.’ ‘You got it.’ ‘Thank you!’

-Jess’ sex dream: ‘So you took me to a dark Victorian alley. It was filthy, I was on top… Our passion drowns out the coughs from the orphans inside-‘ Again, that got dark fast. I like naïvely dark Jess, ‘-and then Winston brings us scones. And that’s it.’

-‘Oh my God, you had a sex dream about me. Well well well, PANCAKES AND SYRUPS GIRLS!! Let’s eat.’ *Cue self-confused look* Sometimes Nick has Michael Scott moments.

-How can I leave with homage to the Purple Rain:

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